Super markets are meant to get costumers lost inside and I’m not kidding. Yeah this is great and all for the business, but I wasn’t a customer or a business owner, I was a child – a six-year-old child in fact. It was my first time going to Real Canadian Superstore without my six-person family. Well, to be honest I was just excited to go grocery shopping without my mom. A trip should last at least one hour, but with her the trip could last several. To make matters worse she wouldn’t buy any snacks during the wait, because “there’s food at home”. Does this make sense? Highly no, since we were going grocery shopping. Let me just highlight that children are gullible and will believe everything their parents say, so when I got home with the groceries my mom would exclaim, “See Eunice there is food at home!” Anyway, back to the shopping day without my mom. I want you to imagine my dad with twins who are six-year-old’s, a eight-year-old, and a one-year-old going to a store that can fit thousands of people. I think we can both agree that society needs to start praising single mothers and fathers who have to do this continuously.
Growing up I have always been a curious, blunt, and spontaneous kid who rebelled against the rules. My dad would say, “Stay put” and I would stand up. However, my disobedience and these characteristics led me to wander away from him and my siblings. Right now, you might be wondering what distracted me in a grocery store? The answer to that question is many things. The snacks aisle, the girl toys and most obviously people doing their weekly routines. I should probably mention that in my younger days, I had a staring problem. This habit did not prolong, because before I knew it I would be payed with a slap to the back of my head from my mother. So in simple terms, when my eyes were focused on one thing I would be put into a trance. I suppose now I wish my mother was there to put me out of this trance and I wouldn’t be lost, but it is worth it since I wouldn’t have this story.
After I got out of my trance, I decided to go look for my family. I walked through the store and through every aisle like I was crossing several streets. Everyone I looked at turned into my dad in my little mind. In that moment, I started to panic but I told myself I had to be independent and try to find them. I started to run instead of walk and circled the store once more while calling out to him. Soon panic turned into fear as I realized that I was lost and tears began to flow heavily. An employee tapped me on my shoulder and asked if I was looking for my parents. I just nodded and proceeded to follow them. My parents never taught me “stranger danger” because I was always surrounded with people that were trusted and I was very sheltered – everywhere they went I was glued to their hip so I only saw their worldviews. I have digressed. Anyway, they took me to the customer service desk and asked me what my father’s name was. They made an announcement on the phone and said, “Can {my dad’s name} please come to the customer service desk”. As I saw my dad walking towards me with my siblings, I was fearing that he was angry. He was not. Instead, my family was laughing at me and asked if I learned my lesson. In fact, I certainly did and was never lost again. After that interesting encounter my dad decided to buy snacks for me to lighten up my sobbing face. The only rule being, “You can eat this when you get home.”
When we arrived home, I wanted to impress him so I was helping pack the groceries inside, but rather quickly because I wanted those snacks. I don’t know how, but I mistakenly put a jug of milk on top of the edge of the fridge (I had a early growth spurt and I tip-toed of course). Before I could turn around, I heard and felt a ‘splat’. I thought I could clean it up before my dad walked in, but these series of actions were right in front of him. Immediately silent anger overcame him. He forced my siblings, me and my sticky clothes back inside the car and we were on our way to Superstore again. The only difference to this story is that he made me stay inside the car and I didn’t end up eating those snacks.
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Dear Eunice,
I loved the content of the story. Getting lost in the store and the spilling something. It was a very easy and simple topic and I really liked it. I also really loved the execution of the piece. They way you broke off and told little side details. It was like i was just listening to you tell me a story in real life.
I would suggest fixing your comment box so people can see what they’re writing. Overall I really enjoyed reading this story. I’m looking forward to more of your work.
Love you Lots,
Oba
Hello Oba,
Thank you for your comment and your diligent behaviour when it comes to school, even though we are on spring break at this moment.😂 I appreciate how you understood how I tried to make this narrative sound like I was telling it to you or my other friends. About the side-tracking, anyone that truly knows me unfortunately realizes that this is inevitable and I do it unconsciously. I’m thankful that you liked it or maybe you are just used to due to our friendship. However, others may not and may see it as an improvement.
I have fixed the comment section. It unfortunately took a whole new theme to fix it due to previous background colors, but you know it’s better and more important if people actually see what they’re writing. I wouldn’t have noticed the problem with my blog if you hadn’t texted me, so again thank you for your diligent and helping self.
I’m grateful you like my blog and I look forward to more of your work as well!
Eunice ✞
Dear Eunice,
I was laughing the whole time when I read this, it stays true to your writing style and adds a little comedic value. I enjoy how you allowed us readers into your interpretation of yourself at a young age(which may I say hasn’t changed very much from now). The structuring of this passage is well organized and put together. How you broke down the story with providing just the right amount of details illustrates a strength in your writing ability.
I really have no criticisms with your piece. So keep up the good writing!
Love,
Kemi
Dear Kemi,
I’m glad you appreciated this anecdote very much! Haha, you of all people truly know me and I’m glad I was able to reflect who I am/was through this piece. I myself have read your pieces and it’s really amazing and powerful.
Thank you once again!
Love,
Eunice ✞
Dear Eunice,
I liked how simple and straight to the point this was. It felt very you and it was nice how you went off into other memories of your childhood. Even though I liked the shortness, I would have liked to see a little more expansion of ideas and details to help it flow better.
Overall, I really enjoy your writing style and will definitely be coming back to read more of your work.
-Kayla:)
(also make sure to check for spelling mistakes because you wrote panic as panick in the third paragraph)
Dear Kayla,
Thank you for your comment and your time to read my piece. Yeah, maybe I’ll expand more on my memories in future posts. I have fixed the spelling mistake.
Thank you again.
Eunice ✞
Dear Eunice,
This piece was done very well and made me remember my childhood and how I too got lost in stores. This brought flashbacks from my past that I have forgotten about. The way you would talk about the main story and little stories in between where very well written and flowed without the reader getting confused.
This is a hard piece to give feedback to, however for the last paragraph it seemed kind of random and there was nothing before hinting that that was what you were going to talk about. So maybe by having more details it could have had that flow beforehand.
Besides that, like I mentioned before, this was very well written and I can not wait to read more of your work in the future. Keep up the great work.
Love,
Elena
Dear Elena,
Thank you for your feedback. For the last paragrapgh, spilling the milk was the highlight of that day, after getting lost in the store. This being said, I believed that I needed to incorporate it into the story because it was an important detail, but not enough to make it’s own narrative. I thought I implied more ‘unfortunate’ events to come, in the title, “a series of unfotuante events”. However, I obviously did not execute it well and needed more detail leading up to it.
Thank you for taking your time to read my piece once again and I too will read more of your work.
Eunice ✞